How to Write a Wedding Do-Not-Play List
Your must-play list shapes the night. Your do-not-play list protects it. It takes ten minutes to write, and it keeps a song you cannot stand, or one tied to a painful memory, from ending up on the dance floor.
Avalon Music accepts do-not-play lists with every wedding booking. Here is how to write one that is easy for your band to follow.
What Couples Usually Leave Out
Group dances you would rather skip
The Chicken Dance, the Macarena, the Cha Cha Slide. Some couples love them and some ban them outright. In Texas, the Cotton-Eyed Joe divides crowds too, so decide before a guest requests it.
Breakup and cheating songs
Songs such as "Before He Cheats" or "Irreplaceable" are great fun at a party, but many couples leave them off on their own wedding night.
Explicit lyrics
With grandparents and kids in the room, list the songs you want skipped or played only in their clean versions.
Songs tied to memories
An ex's song, a song from a funeral, or one that reminds a family member of a loss. You do not have to explain, just list it.
Songs you are simply tired of
If you never want to hear a particular hit again, say so. Your band would rather know.
Reserved songs
Keep your first dance or parent dance songs off the open-dancing set so they stay special.
How to Write It
Keep it short. Ten to twenty songs is plenty. A list of a hundred is hard for anyone to follow and tends to hide the few that really matter.
Include the artist. Many songs share a title, so name the version you mean.
Use two columns if you need them: "never play" and "only if a guest asks." That gives your band room to read the crowd without crossing a line.
Name genres, not just songs. If you do not want any line dances or any heavy rap after 10 p.m., one line covers it.
When to Send It
Send your do-not-play list at the same time as your must-play requests, 4 to 6 weeks before the wedding. That is when Avalon Music asks for song requests, so the band plans the whole night from both lists at once.
Tell your planner and anyone emceeing, too. A guest request that reaches the stage through the best man still counts.
Frequently Asked Questions
Will the band really follow our do-not-play list?
Yes. Avalon Music accepts do-not-play lists as part of every wedding booking, alongside your must-play songs, first dance and special moment music.
What if a guest requests a song on our list?
A good band will politely decline and play something with similar energy instead. If you would rather allow a few songs on request only, mark them separately on your list.
Should the do-not-play list be longer than the must-play list?
Usually not. A short, clear do-not-play list and a focused must-play list give the band the best picture of your taste while leaving them room to read the dance floor.